Term 2 - Blog 093-97

samedi le 21 fevrier 2009 >>
mercredi le 25 fevrier 2009

I've really been slacking off on my blogging lately. This isn't good. Anyways, I'll be sure to write extra in this blog in order to make up for all the lost time. Or maybe not, I've been really stressed lately and there isn't much time to write a lot. Still, I'll try my best.

Why have I been stressed out? Several reasons. I'll state the main one that's been having me freaked out: SCIENCE. I hate Science. And I don't think anyone can ever change my mind about that. Every time I walk into the Science classroom, it seems like I'm dying inside. I'm not lying, Science erases all the creativity out of my mind. I know this is extremely negative thinking, but it's really what I think. It's a stubborn thought of mine. I won't try to erase it because if I think Science is horrible, it helps my self-esteem. I get stressed whenever I do bad in subjects I like...and I don't even want to think about how much more stressed out I would be if I liked Science. It's sad, but seriously true.

Again, time is passing fast. Too fast for me to keep up with it all. It's seriously depressing, I tell you. One day soon I promised I would catch up but again and again it runs away. Perhaps time is afraid of me? Or is it me that is afraid of the constantly passing time?

Middle Years is taking out a lot in all of us. We stagger on each day though, knowing that Spring Break is a only a few weeks away. It's so close, I can feel it. Spring Break won't be much of a break for me though, I have extra theory lessons during it. Ugh, my teacher's tough.

Marks. Grades. Tests. It seems like MY revolves around those things a little too much. Everyone says "I must ace that test!" "I have to study!". Being stressed out is no surprise. When I say everyone, I mean everyone. There is no one in MY who hasn't said "I have to study" at some point in term 2. It's tough on all of us, we just have to bear with it and get smarter. A lot smarter, of course.

Everything changes. So it is reasonable that I will change too, no? I don't want to change though. It's scary, time is changing everyone and it seems like I'm left behind. Perhaps it's just because time just really hates me and won't let me move on, but it seems like I'm always stuck a few steps behind everyone. It feels like I have to rush to be heard. Constantly rushing to catch up to the pace of others...perhaps I'm trying too hard on something not that important? People always say "to go at your own pace", but can this motto really work in a world like ours? If you're slow, people get angry and irritated. If you're too fast, you tend to forget something. But what if you can't help it if you're going too fast or too slow? What if there is no right pace for you? I'm one of those people. I speed up and I slow down. I have never known an in-between. Perhaps one day I will discover my own pace. Or perhaps not. Perhaps this is my destiny to be trapped in a constantly speeding and at the same time slow world.

The SS forum is a great place to relax though. Everyday I go on, if only to read what others post. It seems like I get to know others a lot better through the forum. Their personalities are all revealed on the screen. It's amazing. I love it~

Applied Skills stays the haven it has always been. It's a place where we don't have to get stressed out over homework and we don't have to fret over a test. It's a place where we feel almost at home in the school. I love the class, especially since we started knitting now.

Time's running again. I'm going to catch up for sure one of these days. Just you wait :)